18. Memory Lane

*Thanku so much for the previous comments guys ^.^ I really hope this is okay for you!*

He wiped his brow tiredly and sat down on the couch. Things were transpiring quickly with the move. The whole of the lounge room was filled with boxes as he attempted to start packing. He'd already got most of it done, it was just bits and pieces left to sort along with the transportation of their furniture. He couldn't be more thankful that Nicki agreed to this. Her thinking was that she had nothing to lose by saying yes and everything to gain. Things had understandably been a little off between them but he couldn't blame her with everything that had happened to Auburn. She'd been released from hospital almost three days ago and nothing seemed to have gone wrong yet. They were given a sort of monitor that would alarm them if Aubbie's breathing ever ceased whilst she was sleeping and that eased Nicki's mind considerably. She'd hardly put her down since she'd been discharged. Looking over at them he couldn't help but smile. That's when another issue crossed his mind.

"Oh yeah, that's somethin' else we gotta think about."

"What's that?" She kept her eyes on Auburn and waited for him to answer.

"We should prolly start checkin' out the different schools, see which one suits you most."

"Okay."

He frowned. "Okay? Is that it?"

"Well whattya want me to say, Aubrey?" She looked over at him annoyed.

"I just figured you'd be a lil' more enthusiastic. That's all."

"Well, I'm sorry I ain't jump up with excitement."

"What's with you today? You been actin' like a spoilt brat all mornin'." He shook his head.

"Maybe I don't wanna go back to school." She shrugged and returned her focus back to her baby as he squinted, trying to make sure he'd heard her right.

"Where's all this comin' from?"

"It's not comin' from anywhere. I been thinkin' about it for a while now actually."

"You never said anythin' to me." Standing up he moved over and sat on the same couch as her.

"That's 'cause you never asked." She looked directly at him, the anger had disappeared already. "You just assumed that's what I wanted to do."

"And it's not?"

"Not right now."

"You wanna stay home with Auburn." He sighed with the realisation the he was right.

"Are you mad?"

"No, of course I'm not mad. She's your baby and I understand you wanna spend time with her."

"But?" She knew it was coming.

"I just don't want you to regret anythin'."

"I know that if I go to school and miss out on all these priceless moments with Auburn I'm gonna regret it." She shifted her tiny body in her arms. "School isn't goin' anywhere, I can return to my education when Aubbie's older."

"Does this have anythin' to do with your grades?" His voice was softer as he moved closer to her. It was like he'd read her mind. She hated that.

"Look, I just don't see the point wasting my time there if I'm not gettin' the grades I know I can achieve. It's just too much on my plate right now."

"I'm not gonna act like your Father and force you to go but I'ont think you should make any rushed decisions just yet." He threw his arm around her gently and pulled her into him, being careful not to disturb Auburn. "Give it some time and some more thought first."

"Okay, but it's gon' be the same answer." She smiled as she looked down. Her stubbornness was surely going to be interesting for him as time went by.

***

After locking up the garage, Drake made his way inside as quitely as he could. It wasn't deathly early in the morning but he knew Auburn and Nicki were still alseep. He'd been to drop Sandi off at the airport. Her time with them had come to an end but she'd be seeing them again soon when they made the move official though. After locking up he made his way to their bedroom and shut the door behind himself.

"Did she get away okay?" Her small voice made him jump.

"Yeah, everythin' was fine. Why you awake this so early?" He removed his clothes and climbed under the sheets again, the moment he did so he could feel her moving backwards towards him. Only stopping when his chest was firmly pressed against her back and his free arm laying across her side.

"I can't get back sleep."

"What's botherin' you?" He pressed his lips on to the skin visible in the crook of her neck but she still remained silent. "Talk to me, Nic. What's up?"

"I have to go back to my old house today." She wanted to stay facing the way she was. She always found it easier to talk to someone when she wasn't looking directly at them. But Drake was different. His face made her feel more relaxed. More secure than she had in a long time. Slowly shifting in his hold she managed to rotate herself to be chest to chest with him. "It's nothin' bad. It's just a few things I need to go pick up."

"And you're worried about it?"

"I don't know." Her eyes flickered slightly. "I don't know what I feel right now, or what I should feel."

"I can go with you if you're scared?"

"No. This is somethin' I need to do on my own." She nodded to herself and looked down. "I'll take my phone though and if I need you I'll call."

"Make sure you do." He spoke sternly before kissing her forehead. "You want me to drop you off?"

"I can take the subway."

"You sure?" He questioned.

"Yeah, it'll give me some time to think on the way." She finished speaking and snuggled into him some more. "I don't wanna get up. It's too cold." Her voice was muffled as she spoke into his chest.

"You're gon' love Canada then."

She laughed into his skin before returning back to eye contact. "Are you nervous about today?"

"Not really. I know it's been approachin', I just hope it all goes well. No drama." He was referring to handing his notice in at work. He knew his boss would have something to say but he didn't want Nicki to feel guilty about any of this. It was what he wanted to do.

"You'll be fine." She rubbed his cheek and kissed him slowly before getting out of the bed. "What time are you headin' out?"

"Later today, why?" He yawned as he spoke.

"I just wanna be back in time before you go. Otherwise, who's gon' watch Aubbie?" Her voice disappeared into the bathroom as she talked.

"Oh yeah, I keep forgettin' my Mom's not here anymore." Throwing his arms up under his head he exhaled slowly and relaxed back into the pillow. "I'll just leave whenever you get back."

"Hopefully I can be in and out within an hour." She moved to stand in the bathroom doorway, her toothbrush hanging out of her mouth.

"You reckon your Dad'll be home?"

"I don't know. I hope not." Her sentence was cut short when Auburn started to fuss in her moses basket.

"It's a'ight. I got it." He slid out of the bed. "You go shower, we'll be fine."

"Thanks."

"You express any milk yesterday?"

She nodded and pulled her toothbrush out to spit. "Yeah, it's in the refrigerator."

"Oh good." He smiled down at her sweet little face. "Hear that Aubbie? Breakfast is all done and ready to go. Well, for you it is anyway." He carried on talking to her as he lifted her out, completely unaware that Nicki was watching him admiringly. He was so good with her. Almost as if Auburn was actually his. She wished she was but the bitter memories would always be with her. Every time she looked at her baby she could see Tyrone's face. Hopefully that's another thing the move to Canada would help to heal.

"We'll see Mommy when she's done showering." Cradling her in his strong arms he headed out of the room. His voice still audible until he was too far away to hear.

***

She could feel her nerves eating at her the whole time she was on the subway. Her mind racing with thoughts. What if her Father was home? She had no idea what she'd even say to him. Or even worse. What he might do. Before her thoughts could get any deeper she was pulled back to reality by her phone. It was Drake.

"You there yet?"

"No, I'm just at my stop now." He could her the fright in her words.

"You'll be fine, call me if you need anythin', okay?"

"I will, I promise. How's Aubbie?"

"She's fine, sleepin' like a log. We're watchin' the game." He laughed and checked on her as she napped.

"Why you puttin' her to sleep watchin' basketball, Aubrey?"

"She loves it."

"She loves it? Or you love it?" She smiled into the phone.

"Alright, it was a compromise. She gets to pick next time."

"Torturin' my poor baby." She laughed. "Look I gotta go, I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, we Love you."

"I love you both too." Every time she said those words she couldn't prevent the smile from spreading across her face. Hearing him say it made her smile even harder. Bringing her attention back to the task ast hand she slid her phone back into her jean pocket and proceeded to get off at her stop.

The sights she was seeing along with the smells and sounds were bringing back all kinds of memories. Some good and some bad. Most of them were horrific if she was being perfectly honest but she kept her head down and walked fast to get to her house quicker. The less time she spent on the street, the safer she'd be. Her house could have been picked out by her eyes from miles away. It was strange to think that all of her childhood memories lived behind those four walls. She kept her arms crossed over her chest as she grew nearer, her pace slowing down until she reached a stop. This was it. She was finally going back. Facing her fears. Taking a deep breath she held it in for a second before exhaling calmly. Before she even lay a finger on the gate, a male voice stopped her.

"Nicki?"

She turned in his direction and froze. "Safaree? Oh my God."

"Yeah, it's been a while since I seen you." He smiled as he dumped the bin bag into the trash can. "How you been?"

"Good, really good actually." She smiled back at him and approached the fence. "How about you?"

"I can't really complain" His hands became buried in his pockets. "I ain't seen you since I picked you up from the hospital that time, everythin' okay there?"

"Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about that." She looked down briefly. "I'm good though. I moved out shortly after that."

"I figured. I really missed seein' your face around here y'know?"

"I'm sure you did." Rolling her eyes playfully she smiled again and looked up at him.

"Forreal, I wouldn't lie to you." He folded his lips before becoming more solemn. "Y'know, I'm real sorry to hear about your old man, I can't even-"

"Excuse me?"

"Your Dad, I'm sorry to hear 'bout what happened to him."

"Yeah I heard that part." She looked up at her house with concern. "I just didn't know what you meant.  What's happened to my Dad?"

"You mean no one told you?"

"Told me what, SB? I don't know what you're talkin' about." Although her feelings towards her Father were still very much the same, she was still concerned as to what had happened.

"I'ont know the full story but he's in a nursin' home."

"A nursing home?" Her face  portrayed only utter shock.

"Yeah, you'll have to ask the new house owners what exactly happened, but I'm sure that's what I heard."

"Oh my God." She finally shut her gaping mouth and stared at the house again. "Thanks, I'll go talk to them now."

"A'ight, well make sure you check in with me more often. It was good to see you again." He nodded and smiled that smile as he walked backwards away from her.

"I will, and same to you too." Flashing her dimples briefly she watched him disappear back inside before making her way cautiously towards the front door. Not much had changed, the outside of the house still looked pretty much the same to be honest. Taking yet another deep breath she knocked three times and stepped away in preparation for someone to open. She could definitely hear voices, they sounded like children. Without warning the door opened quickly and a young dark-haired woman was stood before her.

"I'm sorry, whatever it is you're selling, I'm not interested." She was about to shut the door but Nicki's voice halted her.

"No, wait! I'm not selling anything, I used to live here."

"Oh, you're that man's daughter? Nicola?"

"Nicki, actually." She smiled anxiously. "But yeah, I'm Robert's daughter."

"I'm sorry, I should've recognised you from the photos." She shook her head regretfully.

"Photos?"

"Yeah, look, I think maybe you should come in." Holding the door open wide, she stepped aside and let a rather confused Nicki enter the house. It was a lot warmer than she remembered and it smelled nice too. "Don't worry about your shoes, havin' three kids tramplin' 'round is bound to ruin the carpets anyway." She ruffled one of the boy's hair as she led her through to the kitchen. "You want a drink or anythin'?"

"No I'm fine, thank you. I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"Oh, I'm Julie." She reached her hand out and shook Nicki's sweetly. "I'm guessin' you're lookin' for your Father?"

"Actually, no." Looking down shamefully she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I came to pick up my things but I'm guessin' he prolly shopped it all." She shook her head angrily. He'd sell anything to fund his habit. Even his own daughter. She knew that for fact.

"No, your stuff is still here."

"Really?" She looked up with a surprised expression.

"Yeah, that was part of the deal I guess." She leant back on the counter. Rolling her eyes when the children started fighting. They were cute kids. Dark skin with course curly hair and big eyes.

"Deal?"

"See, your Father was a good friend of my husband's and when he was taken into the home for the elderly we got the house. Without sounding heartless, it came at a good time for us." Resting her hand on her waist, Nicki became aware of the small bump under her shirt.

"And y'all got to keep my things?"

"No, he made us promise not to lay a hand on any of your belongings. Your room is off limits, we keep it padlocked anyway so the kids can't get in a cause a riot." Reaching up on top of the cabinet she pulled a small key down. Luckily she was fairly tall and didn't need much assistance.

Her mind was reeling. Why would her Father care so much about her belongings? He didn't give two shits about her whilst she was living here let alone when she wasn't. None of this was adding up to her.

"I can show you up if you want, if not I'm guessing you know your way around anyway." Laughing lightly she placed the key in Nicki's small hand just as the youngest child, a girl, start crying. "Please excuse me."

"Yeah, sure. I can find my own way there, thanks."

The journey to her room was more daunting than she'd actually thought it would be. Every creak in the stairs was the same, the hand-railing still chipped in all the same places and there it was. Her name carved gently into the wood. She can't even remember how old she was when she did it but it was still there. Running her fingers over it softly she smiled and shook her head. Now wasn't the time to be getting all sentimental. Quickening her pace she reached the top of the stairs and came to a halt. This very hallway was the one Tyrone had followed her down, all the way from the bathroom and into her room. Swallowing hard she took the first step and began making her way to the door. It still had her name in pink wooden letters on it. They were old and dirty but they still stuck strong. Growing more and more impatient with her shaking hands she pried the padlock open after unlocking it and opened her door slowly. Everything was still exactly how she'd left it. Absolutely nothing had been touched. Her pen and paper still strewn messily across her desk. Her stuffed animals still in perfect alignment on her bed. Call her stupid but she could feel herself filling up.

Inching in slowly, she left the door open and sat gently on the edge of her bed. It was like she'd never left but in reality so much had changed. She'd grown up more than she had to, that's for sure. Obviously she was only sixteen but another human life was dependent on her now. She had no choice but to grow up. It got too much in the end. She let her guard down and cried for what felt like ages as she lay on her old bed. If it wasn't for the front door opening she would have drifted off to sleep. Slowly sitting up, she rubbed at her pouding skull and stood before pulling the duffle out from under her bed. She just wanted her essentials but found herself trying to ram all her stuffed animals in there too. She managed to make everything fit after a good fifteen minutes of searching and packing. Wiping her nose swiftly she stayed hunched over her bed as she zipped the bag violently. She could hear Julie coming and stood up straight when she finally got it shut.

"Okay, I think I'm about done. Thanks for not throwin' out my stuff." She laughed a little to herself before turning around to face a silent Julie in the doorway. Only it wasn't Julie at all. Her mouth went dry instantly as her heart began pounding. The duffle immediately falling to the floor as the shock hit her.

"Nika." There was a painful pause. "Now, there's a face I thought I'd never see again. "


...


*DUN, DUN, DUUUUN. Lol I love cliffhangers :D I have a feeling some of you are gonna try and guess who it is. Haha anywho, I've been struggling so bad with my fics recently so I went back and re-read some of my chapters and realised that I used to have a lot less dialogue and more descriptive paragraphs. Idk what all you guys prefer but when I'm reading I like lots of description as well as dialogue, so I'm trying to get that back into swing with my stories haha let me know how you feel anyway :) Thanks for all the previous comments! And once again, I hate asking, but I'm gonna ask for 10 comments before I post the next chapter, please. Thanks for reading and I hope it was okay :/*